From Heartbreak to Healing Understanding Life's Transitions - episode 112

When Gabrielle Pimstone spoke of her transformative encounter with her late father's spirit, it struck a chord deep within my soul. Join us in a profound exploration of the intersection of trauma and energy work, guided by Gabrielle's expertise in both psychology and spirituality. Together, we unravel how our nervous systems are sculpted by trauma and illuminate pathways to healing through a harmonious blend of spiritual and psychological practices. Gabrielle's personal narrative of spiritual awakening lays the foundation for understanding the hidden power of love and the unseen energies that surround us.

The corporate ladder can be laden with stress and imposter syndrome, but imagine transforming that anxiety into a source of strength. We tackle the challenges of navigating high-pressure environments and the significance of establishing energetic boundaries, especially for those blessed with spiritual gifts. Through anecdotes of personal adversity, including the heartbreak of my father's illness and passing, we shed light on how events forge our behaviors and the ways in which energy healing can release the traumatic imprints steering our existence. The journey through life's transitions reveals the transformative potential of reinterpreting our past to dismantle limiting beliefs.

Embracing the continuous voyage of self-discovery requires a delicate balance of self-awareness and self-compassion, and we venture into this territory with openness and authenticity. As we dissect the dual nature of emotions and acknowledge our role in our own healing, we invite listeners to consider the psychological benefits that keep us rooted in familiar patterns. The conversation culminates with an intimate look at confronting shame and the cyclical nature of our emotional landscape. Drawing from our personal experiences, we highlight the importance of feeling safe within oneself and the courage it takes to face one's deepest fears. This episode is an invitation to join us in the sacred space of healing, where every step taken is a step towards wholeness and self-empowerment.

Contact Gabrielle here

www.generativegrowth.com.au

Remember, the strongest thing you can do for yourself is to ask for help.
Please help us grow by subscribing to and sharing the Lift OneSelf podcast with others.
The podcast intends to dissolve the stigmas around Mental Health and create healing spaces.
I appreciate you, the listener, for tuning in and my guest for sharing.

Our website
Https://.LiftOneself.com

Find more conversations on our Social Media pages
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Music by prazkhanal

Remember to be kind to yourself.

Remember, the strongest thing you can do for yourself is to ask for help.
Please help us grow by subscribing to and sharing the Lift OneSelf podcast with others.
The podcast intends to dissolve the stigmas around Mental Health and create healing spaces.
I appreciate you, the listener, for tuning in and my guest for sharing.

Our website
LiftOneself.com

Find more conversations on our Social Media pages
www.facebook.com/liftoneself
www.instagram.com/liftoneself

Music by prazkhanal

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hey Natalie.

Speaker 2: 0:01

Hi, how are you yeah?

Speaker 3: 0:03

good, how are you?

Speaker 2: 0:05

I'm well, I'm well.

Speaker 1: 0:07

Welcome to the Lift One Self podcast, where we break mental health stigmas through conversations. I'm your host, nat Nat, and we dive into topics about trauma and how it impacts the nervous system. Yet we don't just leave you there. We share insights and tools of self-care, meditation and growth that help you be curious about your own biology. Your presence matters. Please like and subscribe to our podcast. Help our community grow. Let's get into this. Oh, and please remember to be kind to yourself.

Speaker 2: 0:43

Welcome to the Lift One Self podcast. Gabrielle, I am so thankful you're here with me.

Speaker 3: 0:50

It's great to be here, Natalie. Thank you so much for having me.

Speaker 2: 0:53

It's a pleasure. It's a pleasure Before we start our conversation and to transition into this space. Would you come into a meditation with me? I'd gladly do that. Yes, and for the listeners many listen to a podcast through their car or exercise or activity. So for the visual part, I'll ask you to keep your eyes open because I want you and everybody around you to stay safe. Yet the other prompts you're able to follow along with whatever activities you're doing. So, gabriel, I'll ask you if you could find a comfortable position and close your eyes and begin breathing in and out through your nose and bring your awareness to watching your breath go in and out through your nose, and bring your awareness to watching your breath go in and out through your nose. Don't try to control your breath, just watch how it goes in and out, becoming aware of your inner state.

Speaker 1: 2:03

There may be some sensations or feelings coming up in the body. You're safe to feel them. You're safe to release them, while still staying focused with your breath.

Speaker 2: 2:22

Surrender the need to control.

Speaker 1: 2:25

Release the need to resist and just be, be your breath, drop into your body, keep your awareness on your breath, while still staying with your breath.

Speaker 1: 3:03

Gabrielle, I'll ask you, in your mind, to create an intention you want to bring forth in this conversation and for the listeners, your thoughts into your nervous system, down through your throat and voice, down into your heart, down into your stomach, into your life force, into your energetic field, but still staying with your breath, allowing that intention to grow and surround you. Continue keeping your awareness on the breath should you come back into your senses and, when you're ready, you're going to gently open your eyes. I want you to come back into your senses and, when you're ready, you're going to gently open your eyes, while still staying with your breath.

Speaker 2: 4:41

How is your heart doing?

Speaker 3: 4:44

It's interesting you ask that because my intention that. I said was to come from a heart-centered place, so that's why I put my heart open and I am looking forward to the conversation.

Speaker 2: 4:57

Can you let the listeners know who Gabrielle is?

Speaker 3: 5:02

Well, I am a kind of a composite of someone who is deeply passionate about psychology and deeply passionate about spirituality, and in the last few years I've allowed both of those two passions to come merge. My practice is now working through contemporary psychological challenges in a spiritual framework. So that is how I that's the lens with which I view myself. I've been a seeker of truth ever since I was a young child Age seven or eight I started capturing my dreams and trying to make sense of something wild and crazy dreams, started journaling really regularly and then, after my father passed away when I was about 10 years old, I said to my mum I want to go and see a medium and she said no.

Speaker 3: 5:54

So the spirituality was kind of put on the back burner, even though I had intermittent spiritual experiences and I pursued a career in organizational psychology and five years ago I skilled up as well. I had a kind of a catalyst and inflection point and I landed up studying energy and I did 18 months of it, three levels, and now I bring that modality in to help people really let go of deep blocks, deep traumas, and release and move forward in their life. So that's, I guess, me in a snapshot.

Speaker 2: 6:36

Nice, beautiful. Thank you for that. Were you able to go seek a medium afterwards, in your teens or in your 20s? Oh yeah, I did.

Speaker 3: 6:48

I saw a couple of mediums. Both were exceptional. The second medium that I went to see was on the recommendation of a friend of mine and I sat down with her. She took hold of my hand, she tuned in and she tuned straight into my late father. She started speaking about a middle-aged, graying gentleman coming through who was highly esteemed, which was very much. My father was a well-renowned, like world-renowned doctor, professor of medicine, and she said he wanted me to know that when my brother was in the accident that he had and was very close to death, my father brought him back and my eldest brother for two older brothers, my eldest brother had in fact years before been in a very, very serious car accident. He had to be taken off by the jaws of life and when he was on the operating table he had an ear-dead experience. He felt himself sitting up which of course he didn't do and surveying and watching what was going on. So that was an extraordinary experience and one that I hold really dear to me.

Speaker 2: 8:04

It sounds beautiful and I know some listeners will be open to this and other listeners will be like what are you talking about? I don't understand and as I tell people, it's the other side of love. Unfortunately, a lot of people have a wrong relationship with death, a wrong relationship with spirit, and when you can understand the other side of love and understand energy and frequency and expansion in the universe, it's a beautiful experience to go into all these dimensions. Can you explain to the listeners your definition of energy and what that training is and what you are now practicing?

Speaker 3: 8:52

Yeah, I'm happy to do that. So the way that I see it is, energy is our life force. You know, we sometimes know it as prana chi and it is the thing that regulates everything, both conscious and unconscious. You know, you think about our heart beating, our breathing. We've just gone through a breathing process. Most of that happens out of our awareness and energy. That's, you know, creating that. So I guess the differentiator between when we are alive and when we have passed away this, you know, this physical form, is where the chi, the energy, is flowing through us. But it also has a profound effect on our emotional kind of how we feel, our thoughts, our beliefs, the stories we tell ourselves, our identity, our behaviours, actions, decisions, how we show up or not. So it is this. I always describe it as an invisible force that can either be an accelerator or it can act as an invisible handbrake that keeps you really stuck in life. So that's how I would define it.

Speaker 3: 10:04

I know there was a second part to your question, which is about my healing modality and energy. Yes, so you know I had been working in the field of psychology for, you know, years, decades, and of course I was in my own therapy because of the work that I did and talk therapy. It was an incredibly powerful and enlightening process. I think therapy is well for me, was hugely critical for self-awareness, self-understanding.

Speaker 3: 10:36

But what happened a number of years ago was I was at another inflection point in my life and the psychological tools and techniques that I'd learned had actually stopped working. And actually, when I reflected on my life, even though I was filled with self-awareness, I knew my triggers, I knew all my shadow side, my actual life hadn't changed fundamentally. I was still stuck in the same patterns which were manifest in my life. And when I learned about energy, I realized that all our traumas, whether they happened in childhood, in utero, whether they'd be passed down from generation to generation, all the traumas that we sit with, actually they are just energy, because they're finished. What's left is the energy that's left behind. And what I learned and have now realized in my own life that if you are able to find and release the energetic inception point of your trauma, that's where things shift really fast. And so that's what I do and I use a modality that's based on advanced, sacred geometry to help with that.

Speaker 2: 11:53

Okay, can you let the listeners know what a healing process looks like with energy?

Speaker 3: 12:01

Yes.

Speaker 3: 12:02

I actually was talking about this in one of my podcasts yesterday with two really lovely guys and they kind of, when we debriefed it, they were laughing because they were saying, when the way I describe it, you know, can feel a little bit esoteric. So there is a warning, a disclaimer up front. But basically what I do, most of my clients actually are not based in Australia, they're not even based in Sydney and even if they are based in Sydney, I prefer to do virtual healings. That's my modality and the reason is that you know, if I'm hovering over you and working with your chakra system and kind of clearing out your third eye, whatever it is that I'm doing, you're going to feel that sensation, you're going to be aware of my presence and I want people to really sink into a, ultimately, a fetal state, if they can, but into a deep state of relaxation and I don't want them to be bothered by that. So it's mostly virtual and what I do is I use I've got tools and techniques where you know we've got a physical body but we've also got an energetic body and the energetic bodies where our chakras are meridians, our aura, all those things, and what I do is I'm able to bring the person's uh energetic body in front of me and house it in a particular structure, geometric structure that keeps it intact and that's what I work with. So it feels to me as I'm working that the person's standing in front of me and what I'm doing is because I've activated my spiritual gifts, I am and I've learned how to read energy, I'm reading their energy, I'm going through. I've worked with more than the seven um chakras, but you know I'll go through the chakras, that I work with the seven ones. Most of us know about them and often when I'm in a chakra I'm clearing, I'm feeling the sensation in my hand, I'm getting, I'm a clear audience, I'm hearing, getting messages, getting intuitive things and I'm knowing where to work, where to really double down and often say arguments, say say, um, like I feel something in the person's throat chakra, for argument's sake, that might take me to a variety in a variety of directions. I then branch off. I might get a really intuitive sense that it is from childhood. Yeah, there's some, so are they used? Geometry that allows me to read across their timeline, go into their childhood and really understand what's happening.

Speaker 3: 14:35

I gave this example yesterday, which seemed to you know land. So I was once working on somebody and I was. I can't remember what chapter it was, but it took me into there. I did a childhood kind of healing and reading and I got a very strong visual of this person as a four, five-year-old boy sitting on a dusty road and feeling like self-soothing, feeling like they were, you know, sad but really trying to soothe themselves. And when I finished and I cleared and I did whatever was needed, feeling like they were, you know, sad but really trying to soothe themselves. And when I finished and I cleared and I did whatever was needed and the person came back which is always what happens I bring them back and then we debrief.

Speaker 3: 15:15

I spoke about that. I said this is what I picked up and they spoke about an incident in their childhood where they ran out of church and kind of went to a place that I'd described similar to that, and people couldn't find them. They were on their own, they were feeling scared and then, through language and you know, psychologically, we then spoke about that childhood event. But what I'd done in the healing is I'd found the energetic root, I'd pulled it out, I'd released it and it was gone. But I felt it was really important for the person, as I always do, to understand what I did and to help them make sense psychologically of what they've let go. And then what I do at the end of the session is always give people something pragmatic to walk away with. So, depending on what issue we've been working on, I'll give them something to help maintain their energetic state.

Speaker 2: 16:15

Beautiful. What kind of clientele would come and seek you?

Speaker 3: 16:21

Well, actually, because I've got a corporate background background, a lot of my clientele have been from the corporate world and they often come because they're feeling like seriously stressed or anxious. They're feeling, um, you know, like they need to make a decision but they don't have the to do that. They need that nudge forward. They may be feeling kind of a sense of being an imposter. Senior leaders often talk about feeling very lonely and isolated and disconnected, and so there are all sorts of things that the corporate world presents. Sometimes, you know, working in corporate it's toxic. The corporate culture can be very draining. A lot of people I see they don't know that. They're empaths, so what they're doing is they're absorbing other people's energy. They're absorbing their toxic energy and they feel terrible but they don't know why. And so I help them really work, you know, to put proper energetic boundaries around themselves so that they're not as affected by the environment. So a lot of it is, you know, from the corporate world. But that's starting to shift.

Speaker 3: 17:33

More and more people are coming to me through these kinds of podcasts. Some of them have an interest in you know, somebody's just contacted me. They feel like they've got a gift of mediumship. They want me to activate these spiritual gifts. I do that sometimes. People come to me. Often people come to me when they're in a transition in life, like big change that brings up all sorts of stuff. So I help them navigate that, release what's holding back, get into a non-resistant state and move through change, so, yeah, all sorts of things. So the actual issues themselves are very relatable. And then I bring some of these techniques in and I translate it for my clients so they have a sense of how I'm working with them. I'm always doing that translation piece, you know, yeah, which I think is quite important.

Speaker 2: 18:30

It is it is going back to your childhood with the transition of your father. How did that impact you?

Speaker 3: 18:42

well, I mean, the transition was more than just his passing. The transition, I mean he was sick for about four or five years and so I and he never spoke about it. So that's the other thing. My dad was a professor of medicine. He got terminally ill. It was a very difficult time for him and he kept it secret because I was spot. He spoke to my mom, but the children, because we weren't speaking about it, which was not a good thing, but because I was deeply intuitive, I knew something was amiss and so what actually happened, and this you know, with many, many traumas, I developed a series of limiting beliefs, I guess because this thing was happening to me and I just didn't know how to process it at such a young age. And so, you know, fear overcame me.

Speaker 3: 19:34

I lived for decades with kind of crippling anxiety, grief. It manifested as anger, which was interesting because I couldn't face my grief and anxiety. So I was a rebel. When I was a teenager, I was angry.

Speaker 3: 19:49

I was, you know, all of that, and you know I had some really limiting and crazy beliefs that started to infiltrate my life, for example, because my dad was in the prime of his life when he was diagnosed. I started to. You know, I developed this belief that I can't be successful because if I'm successful, something bad is going to happen to me or I'll pay the ultimate price, just like my father did. So, you know, these kinds of traumas have tentacles in all aspects of our life and we do really need to do the work to understand and release them, and I did a huge amount the work to understand and release them, and I did a huge amount of work to understand them. I spoke about my father's death at nauseam in therapy but, as I said, the behavior like I was still trapped in this invisible prism and it was the energy healing that helped shift that.

Speaker 2: 20:42

Yeah, because, like I tell my clients, you know, replace trauma with energy, and so there's a charged energy inside your nervous system and it keeps activated. You're activating your four F's, your fight, your flight, your freeze or your fawn, and then that you know, a lot of people think trauma is the event or what was experienced and it's like no, what did you interpret from that? And humans of pattern. So we're going to make sense and sometimes what we made as a definition is very illogical.

Speaker 2: 21:19

Yet for the nervous system and the defense mechanisms, it feels like this is a way of protecting you. And until you, like you know, dive into your nervous system to see yourself, see what is going on with your perception and, like you said, you're limiting beliefs, then you come to see all the shift of what have I created, and that is something that's very daunting to look at, because and that is something that's very daunting to look at because no one would want to see that, like some of this is my part, like I've, I've created this because we have this narrative it's all outside of you and then it's like well, if everything's outside of you, you're disempowered, there's nothing that you take access to Exactly.

Speaker 3: 22:07

That's exactly it. I mean, there's so much in what you're saying. I just want to double down on that idea of what am I created, and it's a very confronting piece, but it is empowering, as you say, when I work with human transformation, that's the biggest challenge getting people from knowing they've got a problem to owning it, you know, and so the ownership pieces is difficult. But, as you say, it's not just empowering, it's quite exhilarating when you have moments of awareness and it's the feeling like the strength of motivation. You feel like you're progressing, you're all motivated by that. So it's important.

Speaker 3: 22:46

The other thing people are alluding to is you know, we've got these, these illogical things that keep us trapped and in psychological talk we talk about, we refer to those as the payoff is a psychological payoff. Why would I remain stuck in anxiety for four decades, you'd ask me, when it was awful, and the reason for me the payoff was if I worry, if I'm constantly on edge, if I'm hypervigilant, then bad things won't happen to me. So the payoff was a momentary feeling of relief and it's all unconscious and it's really funky. So I find it interesting, and part of how I work with my clients is to find the intrigue, the curiosity and the joy in unraveling the layers of the onion and learning more about ourselves. I think it's a very thrilling process and most people do about ourselves.

Speaker 2: 23:48

I think it's a very thrilling process and most people do. Yeah, I know like when I say the nervous system, some people are like I don't understand that word. It's too complex, it's too big, and I'm like you're already in your nervous system to say that it you're incapable of understanding it. It's like you're already in a car and it's an autopilot. So once you get to interact with this car, then you're able to maneuver it in the proper way. And when I hear people about trauma and the energy and I'm like, okay, well, your nervous system is like a wild stallion. It is very powerful and you don't want to tame a wild stallion, you don't want to take the power away from it. You want to learn how to ride that stallion and be able to guide it and no longer be dragged by the wild stallion, because that's what happens when you're unconscious and you're you know these emotions and these, um, the fear hijack your behavior. It's the same thing as kind of being dragged by the nervous system because you're in.

Speaker 2: 24:47

Unfortunately, our defense mechanisms have been given a bad rap. Rather than having the compassion of understanding. Like you said, it's trying to protect you, it's giving you a payoff and it's also understanding the chemical dumps that you get with this, like cortisol and adrenaline. It's great, it gets us like why do you think sometimes you like cortisol and adrenaline? It's great.

Speaker 2: 25:05

It gets us like why do you think sometimes you procrastinate and you do things last minute and all of a sudden you got this charge and you can go, yet you're depleted after and it takes you a couple of days to get back up or whatnot, because you ran your system to you, revved it all the way up, drained out the tank and now it's going to take some time to fill it back up. And with the energy and what I'm hearing you say, with your energy work, it's like let's not empty this tank anymore, let's keep the energy flowing all the time, and then you can even gather it and it can get bigger and bigger in the momentum. And really be back attached to your worth. Be back attached to the love within you and let your curiosity be unleashed, because that's the only way you will feel safe and secure and uncertainty in the unknown. That's what you really need and be able to, like, feel joy, which when you've had grief, it's difficult to connect back into that.

Speaker 3: 26:03

It's frightening. I think the thing that I was most frightened of was feeling joy, because I always felt the rug would get pulled out. I become complacent, the rug would get pulled out from under my feet. You know, that metaphor of the wild standing is one that's going to stay with me because I think it's such a beautiful image and I mean I often talk about it, similar to what I often talk about. You know, your energy, your emotions can either control you and be in charge or you can be in charge of them. You know, and so you know, and when I say in charge, I mean riding that stallion in a way that's kind of flowing. You're in flow with it. And every one of our emotions, jackie, has got a golden and a shadow side and we've got to look for the golden side and that's what we've got to look. Even fear, you know we often think about it.

Speaker 3: 27:01

You spoke earlier about the fight, flight, freeze, mourn. You know that's a negative connotation, that feels like we associate fear with being in survival, but actually fear can be a huge enabler in our life. And you know you were talking about spiritual awakening and I was thinking, as you were talking, my spiritual awakening. I was terrified when I started that journey and it was the terror that enabled me to actually go forward. Ironically, because what I what happened was I was so scared of bumping into negative entities and all of that you know creepy stuff that I put very clear boundaries around my journey. I took baby steps, I was cautious and what that allowed me to do was lean into the journey without feeling overwhelmed and, ironically, that's what allowed me to go forward. What I learned from that is that fear can be a major enabler. It helps you put the appropriate boundaries around things, manage risk, do all of those things which are important.

Speaker 2: 28:08

Yeah, and work with your biology, because if you overwhelm it, it's going to go backwards into a pattern that feels like comfort, and not go into the unknown and uncertainty and discover new things. And I always say, like anger is healthy and people are like what? I've never heard that before. What are you talking about? I'm like you have to befriend your anger. Anger is a very necessary emotion, yet it gets a bad rap because most times, because you don't know how to feel it, you're not able to listen to. It hijacks the behavior with aggression or shutting down, where it's like again that wild stallion if you want a visual, you're getting dragged by it where you can ride on it and it's finding ways of letting it have expression and not berating yourself that I shouldn't be feeling this way and I oughtn't to be, and not being able to advocate and use your voice, which will activate a lot of anger also in a person.

Speaker 2: 29:08

And fear, again too, is another. Like if we didn't have fear in our nervous system, we would be dead, like that is what activates the nervous system. And the nervous system has one function don't let this vessel body die. So anything that comes close to that is going to activate the fear, yet you know where there's a car, where there's fire, where there's danger. You get these activations that come up to prime. You Like there's something that physically feels threatening and if you didn't have, you wouldn't know how to create, like you said, the boundaries of. Okay, what is this going to look like? Like I'm taking proactive action to go into this unknown, yet I'm going to tell my, my biology that these are the parameters so I won't overwhelm you, I won't put us in situations that could feel threatening or in danger.

Speaker 3: 30:01

Also, exactly that's exactly the point. Going back to that stallion metaphor, I'm going to milk it for what it's worth. When we're talking about anger, it's useful to differentiate between anger and reactive anger. Reactive anger is the stallion, it's in charge of you, it's running the show, and so anger itself is really. It's also a boundary setting emotion. Reactive anger is where we get tripped up, and I lived in reactive anger for so long, as I said earlier, because it was the secondary emotion. The primary emotion was grief. I was raging. You know why did my wonderful father get taken away from us? What did we do? Well, this is not fair, and so that expressed throughout my life as reactive anger.

Speaker 2: 30:49

Thank you for that. And you know, I, I, I teach, cause people will be like what do you like? The buzzword is to be authentic and I'm like okay, well, if you want to be authentic, that means you have to identify what you were actually feeling in your authentic your, your first emotion, not your secondary. And people are like, huh, secondary. Most people are running off of secondary emotions. They don't know, even know, how to feel what is truly my emotions and, like you said for the empaths, they're taking on everybody else's stuff and interpreting other, everybody else's feelings that they don't even know how to sort out, like what is you, where are you and what are your feelings? And you know for healing what I remind myself because I'm always going through it, because there's no arrival with that being human is traumatic in itself, especially in the world with social media being bombarded with so much information. Especially in the world with social media being bombarded with so much information. It's recognizing that I lost my train of thought. What was I saying?

Speaker 3: 31:52

that sounds very much like me. I'm glad it's happened to somebody else, because I'm usually I. Actually that happened to me a few. What was I saying? No, I've forgotten. Look, I'm in a puzzle, so I've got an excuse. I've literally forgotten. I was listening. And then what were you saying? I don't know.

Speaker 2: 32:21

I have no idea.

Speaker 3: 32:24

It'll be interesting when, uh, we'll come back, we'll come back, it'll be what it has to be you were talking about empaths at one point, because I took a note, um, but I think that was previous thought.

Speaker 2: 32:38

Empaths, that was your previous thought all the secondary emotions wanting to be authentic and people don't know how to actually feel, what their feelings. Yes, this is what it is. With the healing, what people need to recognize, you have to have radical honesty with yourself and that can feel brutal.

Speaker 3: 33:03

It can, yes, it can, and it can elicit shame. I guess that's the risk and you've got to keep your shame in check Because you know, like when you have moments where you realize that actually you've been the common denominator in all your upsets in your life, all your patterns, and that is a difficult, difficult, it is very difficult, and so shame is one emotion to really get in the bud because that can really go down a downward spiral. And one of the ways that I have dealt with shame myself, because shame thrives in silence. When we ashamed, we don't talk about that thing. The best way to get over shame and to, I guess, neutralise its potency is to actually talk about it to somebody we trust, and I think that's an incredibly powerful gift that we can give ourselves to help us move forward and kind of get through impasses in our life.

Speaker 2: 34:09

Yeah, because shame can bring you in a quicksand that is very difficult to come back out of and that suicidal ideation and self-loathing can really get really entangled where it's really difficult to see any light and recognize like you are the light.

Speaker 2: 34:25

it's just very dark, um, and it's again this mechanism is trying to protect you, so it's not in a way of shaming the shame it's recognizing. Okay, this is what's happening and, like you said, having that feedback of speaking to somebody where you can have a sacred space of honesty and somebody's not trying to paint it out of you, it's like, ok, this is where it is. Yet is it true? What are other things that you have to see that you're not allowing the context of everything to be seen?

Speaker 3: 34:58

Yes, You're just in one little part of it Exactly and that kind of inquiry like really debunking the truth of the thing that's making you feel shame is a really important intervention. But sometimes moving through shame is just as simple as realizing that we all feel shame. You know, I'm not the only one who's sitting and cringing about something in my life. We've all been there um often in our lives, so it's a universal experience and that helps me feel a lot less caught up in it exactly and it's.

Speaker 2: 35:34

You know, sometimes I have to remind myself as well as my clients. It's like, just because you think that you face something and you feel that it's healed or healing, don't be surprised when it comes back and knocks as a visitor. Because then it's like can you interact with me? Are you able to sit with me? That's what the shadow work is, where people think isolate it and it's gone now and it's like it's going to come back and it's how can you interact with this?

Speaker 3: 36:05

that's right, and it comes back. For me, my experience has been it comes back in a different form. Uh, when I do the energy you know I release a primary core root of a block. It can certainly come back. But what I found and what my clients have told me, is that this, when comes back, you're not riding the stallion. There I go again. You're able to now interact with the emotion because it's not as terrifying Something. The valence, the charge has been released and now you're able to interact with it in a healthy way and listen to it and honor it and value it and sometimes debunk it whatever it is. But actually you know it's. You've got to get to that point. The first round of talking about healing. It gets rid of the overwhelming nature of it and then, when it comes back, you have a different relationship to it, for sure, nature of it, and then when it comes back, you have a different relationship to it for sure.

Speaker 2: 37:06

Yeah, it's that charge, because when you haven't felt it and when you've pushed something down down, there's a real big charge to it and for it to come up in the body it is overwhelming. There's physiological things that go on your heart. You're sweating, your body temperature like your system is really on hyper vigilant alert and that does not feel good. Um, so, you know, doing the energy healing, it removes that charge. So now you can see it without it alerting the system of oh no, we can't look at this, we can't feel this. It's like no, we, we, we can look at it. And it's a beautiful thing when there's something that used to supercharge you with either tears or anger, where you could have laughter, like you can bring the humor to it and be less serious with it, exactly.

Speaker 3: 38:00

Exactly since I've worked with energy where I've had to sit in a particular pattern or a particular emotional block. It usually takes me about three weeks of deep immersion to release something that's been holding. I sat in shame for about three weeks. That was intense. I sat in grief and terror and fear for about three weeks and when that came back, when the fear came back at a later stage, it was more appropriate given the circumstances and it was more manageable. But I guess guess telling you the story because we talk about you know how do you face into your fears. Immersion is the most effective way of doing that, where you don't hide from it. You feel the emotion, you dream about the emotion, you document your dreams, you talk about it, you're absolutely in it, but you're doing so from a place of love. You're pouring consciousness and loving attention onto that thing and eventually it dissipates and when you pop out you feel that relief and release and, as I said we've said over and over again, when you are triggered again, you never come back to the intensity of that. You process it in a very different way. I highly recommend to people you know dedicating periods of time to working through and processing these things and sitting in it as long as you need to.

Speaker 3: 39:41

When it came to anger I had, it was I released within 30 minutes, but it was the most intense 30 minutes of my life. I felt like I wanted to jump out of my skin. I was actually on call to one of my mentors and they had to talk me off the ledge metaphorically, because I actually it was so uncomfortable to go on the physiology of it. It was rage coming to the surface to be released and thankfully it took 30 minutes to release a lifetime's worth of rage. But the experience was very intense. I had to breathe my way through it. I had to go out into my garden and sit in sunlight. It was pretty intense, but I think it's really thrilling and exciting when you look back it is.

Speaker 2: 40:29

It is and seeing the capacity of what our biology can go through and really like it's really priming the mind that you have the capacity, yet allow yourself the space and be with people that can hold space also, so they can empower you to remind you you know what you are committed to and that you're not alone and that you have that safety also. I want to bring you into a reflective question. I want to ask you to bring your awareness right now and go back to your 18-year-old self, and you have three words to tell your 18-year-old self to carry you through the journey. What would those three words be?

Speaker 3: 41:16

You are safe. You are safe. When I was 18 and I was in my first year of university, I was wild. I was 18 and I was in my first year of university. I was wild, I was running wild and so I would actually and it was because I felt so unsafe I would say you are safe. Those would be my three words. If you want three separate words, I can give you three separate.

Speaker 2: 41:40

That's good. You are safe. Yeah, it's exactly what needs to come out Now. I know from our discussion people are wondering where can I find Gabriel and where can I access her? Can you let the listeners know how they can get in touch with you or where to find your resources?

Speaker 3: 41:59

Well, a lot of my resources you will find on my website. My company's name is Generative Growth, so generativegrowthcomau, because I live in Australia, you'll see I've got a 20-minute downloadable masterclass on how to access your future self. It's a bit of time travel. It's beautiful, it's great for manifestation, and there are also different other things that you can do. All my podcasts are there. Interesting, there's some interesting resources. Uh, yeah, otherwise, connect with me on instagram. Grab Gabrielle Darkenstone. I'm very responsive. I'm constant dm dialogue with my followers and I'll do the same for you and uh for the listeners.

Speaker 2: 42:43

I'll have that all in the show notes so that it's clickable, so that you can get in contact with Gabriel. I am thoroughly thankful that the intention was served, because it was very heart-centered and very open. This was a very delicious conversation. Thank you so much for being a guest on the podcast.

Speaker 3: 43:04

Thank you so much for being a guest on the podcast, natalie. Thank you so much for being a podcast host and just having these kinds of platforms to get people's messages out, and for being such an incredible podcast host over and above that.

Speaker 2: 43:16

So thank you very, very much Thank you and I want to leave you with thank you for doing the alchemy in your life, taking the impurities and turning it into gold, and you're offering that to other people so that they don't have to go through the ways that you had to. You're shortening the ways for them to really get back into joy and feeling life. So thank you for that alchemy.

Speaker 3: 43:42

Absolute pleasure. Thank you for saying that as well. It's my greatest gift.

Speaker 2: 43:47

Please remember to be kind to yourself. Hey, you made it all the way here. I appreciate you and your time. If you found value in this conversation, please share it out. If there was somebody that popped into your mind, take action and share it out with them. It possibly may not be them that will benefit.

Speaker 1: 44:12

It's that they know somebody that will benefit from listening to this conversation, so please take action and share out the podcast.

Speaker 2: 44:22

You can find us on social media on Facebook, instagram and TikTok under Lift One Self. And if you want to inquire about the work that I do and the services that I provide to people, come over on my website, come into a discovery call liftoneselfcom.

Speaker 1: 44:42

Until next time, please remember to be kind and gentle with yourself. You matter.