Transforming Trauma: Vandana's Journey Through Reiki, Spiritual Healing, and Self-Compassion

What if you could transform unresolved traumas into a pathway for personal growth? Join us as Vandana, a Reiki master who has delved deeply into various spiritual traditions, unravels her unique journey. From becoming attuned to the healing energies of Buddhism, Sufism, and Hinduism to creating her own modality called Rich Healing, Vandana shares how these experiences have shaped her life and work. We dive into the importance of inner child and ancestral healing, and discover how the ACA's 12-step process can be a lifeline for empaths navigating spiritual and emotional blocks.

In a heartfelt segment, Vandana recounts the profound experience of receiving her spiritual name from Amma (Mata Amritanandamayi), a revered spiritual leader. The emotional journey over three days, filled with anticipation and internal conflict, ultimately led to a significant moment of self-acceptance and spiritual alignment. Vandana opens up about the impact of this new identity, shedding light on the deeper layers of unresolved trauma and the importance of embracing a spiritual name as a symbol of fresh beginnings and deeper spiritual connection.

Reiki's transformative power is another cornerstone of our discussion as we explore its ability to heal and regulate the nervous system. Vandana explains how Reiki can create a state of calm and well-being by addressing the roots of trauma. We also tackle common misconceptions about different healing modalities and emphasize the need for integrating spiritual and human aspects to achieve holistic well-being. Finally, you'll hear empowering insights on self-compassion, reparenting the inner child, and the significance of sharing this valuable conversation. Tune in to reconnect with your higher self and embark on your own healing journey.

Learn more about Vandana here:

https://vandanalighthealing.com/

Chapters

• 0:00 Exploring Healing and Spirituality Through Conversation
• 12:11 Embracing Spiritual Names
• 30:02 Healing Through Reiki and Spirituality
• 36:41 Healing Inner Trauma and Self-Compassion
• 52:54 Spreading Healing Through Sharing

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Welcome to the Lift One Self podcast, where we break mental health stigmas through conversations. I'm your host, nat Nat, and we dive into topics about trauma and how it impacts the nervous system. Yet we don't just leave you there. We share insights and tools of self-care, meditation and growth that help you be curious about your own biology. Your presence matters. Please like and subscribe to our podcast. Help our community grow. Let's get into this. Oh, and please remember to be kind to yourself. Welcome to the Lift One Self podcast. I'm your host, nat Nat, and I have a special guest with me tonight. Her name I hope I don't butcher it, so please forgive me if I do Her name is Vandana and I want to know how she got to. Vandana and you know, know a little bit about what you bring forth in the world and what you create. So if you can, let the listeners know a little bit about who you are and what you have to offer, Thank you, nat.

Speaker 2: 1:08

Nat, well, I've just been following my soul's calling probably since 2006 when I became a Reiki master. I used to be a Reiki master teacher. When I became a Reiki master, I used to be a Reiki master teacher and then that's probably the same year that I discovered Ama, who has been my spiritual teacher since then and that's where I got this name, which means basically it kind of means a blessing. It carries a very high vibration and also could be translated to namaste, so it's a very sacred, devotional name. Most of my clients and students actually all of them know me by this name and, yeah, I just knew that I had to find a way to authentically like, authentically be myself, but also to follow my true path, my highest path and my really reconnect to my divine identity. And so over the years, I've been a teacher of various healing modalities, like access consciousness. Also, I created my own healing modality. I created my own healing modality, which used to be called Rich Healing, back in like 2013. I've been on lots of telesummits, podcasts, have my own podcasts, and these days I'm really focused on reconnecting and reparenting our inner child, our inner teen and all the parts of us that really still haven't had our needs ever met, the parts of us that feel exiled and vulnerable and really unsupported in the world, disconnected from our higher power, from our higher power. I've also been doing my own inner child work for the last couple of years through a group called ACA. We have a 12-step process and a lot has come up, but it's very, very it's been very liberating and it really has helped me to establish much stronger, healthier boundaries in all of my adult relationships. We call adults who still suffer from the symptoms of childhood trauma, repeated childhood trauma, so many small T's instead of necessarily one big T for trauma. So this group actually helps us to kind of process this trauma but also to talk about our feelings and to even really understand you know why we're here and really to heal those damaged relationships that many of us suffer from as a result of dysfunctional parenting. So a lot of my work is ancestral healing.

Speaker 2: 4:06

I also studied a lot with a really amazing teacher. His name is Daniel Forr and have my own ancestral altar. Also I studied with Thich Nhat Hanh. I'm still a member of the Rock Blossom Sangha. I've been a Buddhist for 17 years now with the SGI and then with Nichiren Shoshu and Nichiren Shu. So I've also been a Sufi. I've also been practicing Sufism, as well as learning about Hinduism through Amma's grace, amma's grace. So I've explored pretty much every spiritual tradition. So I guess it's for me it's not just about one thing, it's about seeing the beauty and recognizing the value in all things, you know, and really that's what I'm all about for the most part.

Speaker 2: 5:01

So I've been teaching, I've been healing, I've been, you know, writing, researching and speaking, but also listening, trying to listen to, you know, my soul's whispers, to see, like, what's next for me, which is something it's a practice, to stay present in the moment Because, as you know, this world is, is really this timeline? This world is really this timeline. This planet is suffering a lot. And being an empath, I also focus a lot on empaths and how we can navigate our abilities right so that we don't absorb all that toxicity, the duality, the negativity that keeps accumulating on our planet globally. But really how to feel safe, feel heard, feel like just connected to our higher self. And that's really important because a lot of us are really struggling in that area, are really struggling in that area.

Speaker 2: 6:10

So I mostly work with women, but men too.

Speaker 2: 6:11

I teach all kinds of workshops, from chakra balancing to, you know, akashic readings, to mediumship, to psychic development.

Speaker 2: 6:20

You know, I just really try to empower everyone as much as I can to remember their own power and also to get unstuck from all of those blocks. You know the blocks, the contracts, the vows and agreements that are really passed on to us. We really inherit them and they are transmissions in themselves. They become, they actually get lodged into our nervous system, even in the womb. So I like to take people on journeys that's really what I enjoy doing to really kind of ground people but also to regulate and calm our nervous system. Because these days I think most of us especially energy sensitive people, I think we are all really flooded and our nervous systems are really dysregulated and what happens is that leads to just more and more overwhelm and also not making very good choices about what the next steps are. A lot of us are stuck between worlds and that's why I help people to kind of get clear and just more present and understand the deeper meaning of this life.

Speaker 1: 7:39

Would you be willing to come into a mindful moment with me so that we can ground ourselves in our breath and open our hearts and dive a little bit deeper into? Oh yeah, let's do that for the listeners. As you always hear about my safety spiel, uh, most of you are listening to this while driving, so please do not close your eyes. Safety first, yet the other prompts you're able to do while driving, biking, walking or whatever you need for your visual. So, um, bandana, did I say it properly? Bandana, bandana, bandana, sorry close.

Speaker 2: 8:18

very good, very good. Let's, let's um, yeah, let's just really settle down and into our seat and feet and feel the floor underneath you, but at the same time let's expand and really open up and deepen, soften into our heart space. So let's do that, but at least try to do that for a few minutes.

Speaker 1: 8:40

If you're willing, close your eyes and begin breathing in and out through your nose, and don't try to control your breath. Just bring your awareness to watching your breath go in and out, watching the rhythm, allowing it to lead you in your body. There may be some sensations or feelings coming up, and that's okay. Let them surface. You're safe to feel. You're safe to let go. Surrender the need to control, release the need to resist and just be, be with your breath, drop deeper into your body Now.

Speaker 1: 9:36

There may be some thoughts or to-do lists that have maybe popped up in your mind, and that's okay. Gently, bring your awareness back to your breath, creating space between the awareness and the thoughts and dropping deeper into your body, just allowing yourself to be Again. Those thoughts may have come back up. Bring the awareness back to your breath, beginning again, creating more space between the awareness and the thoughts, dropping deeper into your body, into the breath, into being Now, while staying with your breath, at your own time and at your own pace. You're going to slowly open your eyes. How is your heart doing.

Speaker 2: 10:38

My heart is open open.

Speaker 1: 10:52

My heart is curious. My heart is calm. So you mentioned that you were giving a spiritual name and I know maybe some of the listeners are like what are you talking about? We don't understand what that is. Could you explain what that process was and what got you on that journey?

Speaker 2: 11:05

it was my three-day vision quest, um, because all three days until I received my spirit name, basically like a soul name, a high vibrational name, a name that aligns with my soul, my soul identity, my, my soul, my soul identity, my soul truth, my soul voice I was in a battle with my ego. My ego was really trying to take over, stay in control, to help me feel safe, but I kept coming across lots of obstacles. Once I asked if I was allowed to have a spiritual name, a soul name, um, which I really felt would shift my vibration and shift and raise my vibration, but like open up a new pathway, a new doorway for me, which it did. A new pathway, a new doorway for me, which it did. But it took three days of these strange obstacles where I kept being told that, well, alma doesn't give a spiritual name, a spirit name, and you'll have to go to her retreat. She doesn't do it in New York.

Speaker 2: 12:24

And I've been seeing Alma and receiving her darshans, which is in the form of a spiritual hug and a mantra that she whispers in your ear for about 14 years prior to that, or maybe at that time it was about 12 years, and so I felt like I was ready and I really yearned my heart, yearn to grow closer to her because also my own experiences with my biological mother that raised me. Her transmissions are unconditional love and I've never felt so held, embraced and nurtured by my own mother as I did with her, and so I definitely felt like I was ready to do it. But again, and I kept being told, like she doesn't do it, come back tomorrow. You know, I couldn't really stay in the now and really appreciate all the transmissions that I was receiving, with a hug, or without a hug, with a virtual hug Right that she always gives thousands of people, just by being in her presence I couldn't stay present. You know, it just was like in the future, like what's going to happen? Am I going to get my name or not? You know.

Speaker 2: 13:37

So my, my inner, you know tormentor was really kicking up and really wanting to be heard, you know, and and I, I just noticed that part of me and I just kind of sat with it and listened to it without like fighting with it, with that part of me that just wanted to be heard and seen, and and and and also to have this need met that the inner child was still struggling with so long story short, because I could talk forever about this. It was difficult. There was definitely an internal battle and conflict and the more I was told no, the more I pushed back on that. And then, finally, the third day, I kept coming back because it's like I needed to have that name and it really wasn't about the name it was about. Now I understand in retrospect. It makes perfect sense.

Speaker 2: 14:37

This was part of my spiritual journey. Some may call it a test, like a spiritual test from the universe, but it was really about not about the name and not about ama, but really about me and all the parts of me that still felt unheard, unseen and invisible and really not enough or not even worthy enough to have a spiritual name from this, you know, this ascended master, basically. So I finally got my name and but it took a long time of waiting, a lot of patience, a lot of self talk, you know, and it was. It was almost like it was stretched out those three days, but like three years or three lifetimes, and it was. It seemed like it was taking forever. Why? Because I wasn't really in my body. I wasn't really, I wasn't grounded, I wasn't present. I was either pulled back to past traumas, unhealed wounds and memories you know that this reminded me of again I'm not being heard, I'm not being, I'm not being given what I deserve.

Speaker 2: 16:07

So, finally, at the end of the day, you know and I had to have many talks and push through shyness and self-consciousness and go to the front of the room and talk to these high level Rishis and you know her, her assistants, her devotees and and say, hey, you know, I was told to come back. I was told I can get a spiritual name. Alma told me yes, and everyone else is saying no, I'm like, I'm not crazy. She told me yes and then finally, yeah, after being pushed through all of that uncomfortability, she pulled out a book. She gave me a, which is a blessing, as I mentioned, and then she pulled out this black book which has names in it I guess I have no idea to this day and she pointed to a page which seemed like randomly, but I'm sure it wasn't um, and then I was given a piece of paper with my name on it and I got what I wanted and I still didn't like.

Speaker 2: 17:09

I was happy, but I was still like processing everything that that came up for me. All the karma was still in the process of lifting, clearing, releasing, and everything was being reassembled in my psyche, right. So it felt like everything that I've been struggling with was still playing out, but I just had to sit with that experience and integrate it, which I did. And then it wasn't until about six months later that I had a business partner when I created Rich Healing, which later was changed to Accelerated Lighted Healing that my former business partner suggested that we use our spiritual names, my name coming from spiritual names, my name coming from Amma and his name coming from his higher self. No one really gave him the name he named himself and I thought, well, I don't know, but yeah, and then it just stuck and this has been.

Speaker 2: 18:19

You know, I've been Vandana since 2013, formally, and so this is this feels right now. It feels like I've grown into the embodiment of whatever the frequency of this name is meant to do for me. I've grown into this identity, right, and so that's the story behind my spiritual name, and the reason why people um desire spiritual names is because they don't feel they feel like they've outgrown their birth name and because every time your birth name is said by anyone, it just brings up, it carries, it encapsulates all the energy of everyone else who has ever said your name, from the moment you were conceived, basically. So it kind of reminds people or it kind of brings people back to the past, which is not always so pleasant for a lot of people and because we're shifting and accelerating and awakening so quickly, so rapidly, that a lot of people feel that they don't, that their name doesn't even feel like them. It's like a vibrational mismatch, if you understand what I mean.

Speaker 2: 19:42

And when people call me Meryl, I mean what I mean. And when people call me Meryl, I mean I used to really dislike my name because I never felt like Meryl. I never liked my name. Even growing up I didn't like my name at all. But then later I started finding things about my name that I do like, that I do, and you know that I do honor, because it was my parents, my birth parents, that named me this name. And when I started looking it up, it's like oh, mer means light and you know, or like, like mermaid. Well, you know, like mermaid, merman, merman, but it's more like light. So mer, depending how you say, it definitely feels like a better match than it used to.

Speaker 2: 20:28

But Vandana, it's like all of these parts of me are still inside of me, mm-hmm, but they're connected to different sources, if that makes sense, and I think, like I said, you asked me. Well, maybe people don't understand what a spiritual name is. It really is like when I became a Reiki master, I realized that I was able to more easily connect to my higher self, my I am presence, but also to my spirit guides and to the other hundred and four, 43 versions of me, my soul extensions, other soul versions of me, um, and that's why I think people ask for a spiritual name, whether they give it to themselves or whether it's from a teacher. Um, I have a Sufi name. I have a lot of different names, but Vandana is the one that feels like the most me. But it took a while for me to accept this and receive this blessing and really express gratitude for even my birth name and all the parts of me. Yeah, so that's, that's my, that's my story how did you find Anna Mama?

Speaker 1: 21:47

Yeah, how did you find her? And what, what?

Speaker 2: 21:50

Oh well, I was working at the Deepak Chopra Ayurvedic center and spa, which was also a blessing. I worked there for about two years and I was actually handpicked I think they interviewed about 200 people and I was one of 10 that were selected and that was a wonderful, enlightening experience. I learned a lot about myself. I had a lot of downtime because it wasn't like a very active environment, so I had a lot of time to meditate there and to teach other people how to meditate as well. And then I had a coworker and she was an Ayurvedic doctor from India and one day she was very excited and she told me, and she told everybody, that we must go and take time out of our work day or go after work or before and see Amma. And I had no idea who that was.

Speaker 2: 22:46

I mean, I was still like knowledgeable about different spiritual traditions and I think I've heard, I had heard of her, but she said it in such an emphatic way that I couldn't say no, she's like your life will completely change, like she'll be able to. You know, she can clear all that negative karma and social karma and and your whole life can open up in a whole new way. And then I, I went in and, like everybody from my job also went, like all the massage therapists and the estheticians and the the staff. We all went and it I, you know I've been going every year, except for this year and the years that she wasn't able to come to New York because of the pandemic.

Speaker 2: 23:37

And, yeah, I still have pictures of her all over my bedroom and I have a little doll that represents her that actually is made from articles of her clothing. Okay, yeah, it's, it's love, it's pure love. If you watch any of her videos, you'll see her hugging babies, the elderly, the disabled, and it's just, there's no difference, like, and she's able to superhumanly do this for 24 hours, sometimes a day, and, no, no other person that I know of has the ability to do it. So this is her mission and I just feel really blessed to be able to carry her name.

Speaker 1: 24:18

Yeah, Now some listeners. They may know about Reiki, yet some of them may not really know in depth of what that is and how it's used as a modality for your energy. Could you simplify it for the listeners?

Speaker 2: 24:35

Absolutely so. Reiki is thousands of years old. It's a natural healing system that was brought to the West by Mrs Takata, but it actually was created in Japan in the late 1800s by a Japanese monk named Mikau Yasui. There are many different lineages of Reiki, different traditions, but it's all the same. Reiki just is loving light, life force energy, it is vitality, it's life force energy, it's pure love, it is vitality, it's life force energy, it's pure love. It is something that you know. They say Jesus was the first Reiki practitioner, because it's really a laying on of the hands in a very gentle way. It's really like the activation of our healing abilities through the hands, and not only through the hands can also be sent at a distance, but also through the eyes and through the heart. So reiki can be performed in person. It can be performed at a distance, remotely. You can even send Reiki with the four healing symbols which I teach and I also teach animal Reiki as well and that could be sent at a distance, even to your inner child, to a past life, to a doctor's appointment or anything coming up for you, to a world situation, war, genocide, whatever is going on in the world. Um, yeah, so it is. It's vast, it's infinite and it it's a natural healing system. It's it's we all have this ability, um, and it can be performed in a chair, on lying on a table, you're fully clothed, and it's just peace. It's just peace and it's space, and it is allowing us to become a hollow bone and a vessel of this light. So the practitioner, the Reiki master, the teacher, um, says a prayer, connects to spirit, connects to source, connects to the. I like to call in white light, but some people call in gold light or pink light. It doesn't really matter, but it's a. It's a, it's a higher dimensional, higher vibrational light, it's source light or it's intelligent. It's intelligent light, um, and um, it's really changed my life.

Speaker 2: 27:25

I remember offering, when I was learning it, to my mom, who was struggling with medical issues at that time, and she was sitting on a chair and I was visiting her, and she said she's never felt so relaxed in her whole life and she was almost crying, which she never did. She was, um, just very shut down emotionally. And she and I said well, what did you envision, did you? You know, because a lot of this. When I guide people through mindfulness journeys, I always like to check in and ask like, what did you experience, right, just like you did earlier? And she said, oh, I saw, you know, her father, my grandfather at the time, just walking down Sandy Beach and you know, just feeling really at peace and really close. And she felt that intimate connection and she felt very loved. And it was such a blessing for me because I was first, I was still learning and I, you know, I was, of course, I was very happy for her, but I it was confirmation, that confirmation that, hey, this stuff really works, you know, and anybody can become a reiki practitioner, even children.

Speaker 2: 28:44

I've also taught children reiki, I've attuned them to reiki, as well as my cats. So, you know, reiki is for everyone. You know, there you don't have to be a spiritual person, you know to to receive this and to connect with Source. Because it's really about a reconnection to Source, to our Creator, god, goddess, whatever you call the universe, the God Goddess of your understanding, whatever that is. I call it a higher power and the thing is we're so disconnected from our higher power that it's kind of like a remembrance, it's a journey of remembrance, remembering like, wow, I do have this higher version, this ancient, immortal version of me that was never born and can never die, and so Reiki is used.

Speaker 2: 29:42

I've used it in hospitals, I've worked along hospital staff, nurses and doctors. I'm also a medical Reiki master and so that allows me, with this certification, to go into hospitals to see patients who are having in or outpatient surgery as well. And what it does is it creates this immediate sense of relief, this release, this calm, this peace, that everything is going to be okay. So if you're in overwhelm, stress, anxiety, it's a definite stress buster and it's kind of magical and mystical because we don't really know how it works, but we know that it does work.

Speaker 1: 30:30

And, from what I've experienced, what it is is it's a regulation of the nervous system. If the nervous system is active in the fight, flight, fawn or freeze, you're not connected to self and the whole thing is the journey of connecting back into self, which is part of God, allah, universe, whatever you want to call the higher power. Yet defense mechanisms block that vulnerability because it wants to protect you. Yet it's to learn to create that safety in your body so that the nervous system doesn't have to hijack everything and go into protection mode, that you can open yourself up to spirit and have that trust within yourself. And in that connection, I know a lot of people are like, oh, energy or Reiki or light, and it's like, okay, well, it's fusing the two, like there's a spiritual part and there's a human part, and a lot in this world it's either choosing the spiritual or going into the human part of mindset and it's really being able to integrate and blend the two, not choosing one over the other, and being able to maximize time as a tool. That that's our most valuable currency that we have.

Speaker 1: 31:43

Yet a lot of us think that we have to earn time and it's like no time is your tool, yet it's really understanding your nervous system and how it's activated. And when people talk about past lives, it's like really understanding Nervous systems create other nervous systems, so those energetic charges are placed in the nervous systems. So a lot of times, you know, when people talk about past life, regression, or they're a child and have these dense emotions and dense experiences that you know their present life didn't have these experiences but they can relive them. It's like these charges that came from the lineage of their nervous systems. So really, when we can understand how to tap into energetically what this intelligence of in our body, that we can blend the two of spirituality and the humanness aspect, does that make?

Speaker 2: 32:41

sense it does and and to your point, um, it's for everyone. There are no requirements, like, no prerequisites. And what reiki does that other healing modalities miss is that it actually, with its own intelligence, can move into the core, the root of where this trauma was first formed, the origin of the trauma, and many times it's also inherited, it's genetic, it's generational, and it does help to override or move beyond the fight-flight system into the sympathetic nervous system, into the parasympathetic nervous system of rest, digest process, integrate, right, which is our natural state of being. And since this is a natural healing system, you know, of course it's going to help you return to your natural state of well-being mind, body, spirit and get you back into your body again and also get to the root core of where the pain, whether it's physical, mental, emotional, spiritual began. So it's kind of a rewinding or an unwinding or repatterning, whatever you want to call it, and it helps to really drop a lot of that heaviness and density and a lot of the armor that we lug around with us, which doesn't even belong to us. So, and Reiki is eternal, I mean, it's always existed, you know.

Speaker 2: 34:17

And when people say you know, in the metaphysical community and I've heard this over and over for years. Well, oh, reiki is so yesterday, or what I do, carries a higher vibration. I just laugh because it's all one, we're all. There's only oneness Like. There's no like better or worse, there's no good, bad, right, wrong. You know. There's no like better or worse. There's no good, bad, right, wrong. You know, everything is energy. Energy can't be born, it can never die. So when I tell people that it's just, you know it's not about better or worse, you know, and and that is more, about ego, and reiki is not about ego at all. Reiki helps you to put your ego aside, right, yeah, and reveal your true self.

Speaker 1: 35:02

Right, and see for me the definition of ego is your defense mechanisms of the nervous system. Because when you're in that activation of fright, flight, freeze or fawn, you are in a state of fear and think that you're of this world, not being able to access that. You're in the world but you're not of it. So when you regulate the nervous system and release the protection aspect, that you no longer need this protection, then the body's like are you sure we're safe to feel our authentic emotions? Because many of us don't even know how to feel our authentic emotions, we're just in reaction and patterns because it feels that it might be too debilitating to feel that intense energy that's coming up through the body. And you know to do healing means you have to feel, and feeling sometimes is going to be shitty, it's not going to be enjoyable. And you know something with your mental because you understand there's parts of you that are hiding from you that you know you're, you're creating this, but you don't know how to access, how to uncreate it, and so that's why it's really important to face that nervous system so that it doesn't go into activation and that there's that disconnection, so that you can be in flow and you can be in connection and not separate from self. When these big emotions come up and you feel it and you articulate it Because many of us don't even know how to articulate what we're feeling it's like I don't know, I don't know. And then, once you can listen because those emotions are data, they're information surfacing to try to give you information.

Speaker 1: 36:41

Yet we've been habituated to ignore that, to separate, to feel like that isn't going to serve me in any way where it's like, well, you're splintering parts of yourself and it's to come back into a whole with a W, all the parts that they integrate and they come as a whole not a hole with an H but a hole with a W and come together.

Speaker 1: 37:07

Yet you know, I think in society too, because of technology and you know, the same day, service of prime, everybody wants it in a snap of a finger that a miracle means everything's going to go my way, and it's like, well, no, you'll get clarity. Yet you still have your work to be able to process and understand what the activations and what the triggers are and and really start trusting yourself, to come out of the validation of others and validate yourself, to access your own power and your own permission of what you are experiencing and to honor your gift. Many of us don't even know what our gifts are because we've been told it's invalid or it's it has no relevance or it's not going to earn you money into this world or whatnot. So people are separated from that and not able to access that light, that energy in its full capacity. That is mind-blowing it is.

Speaker 2: 38:04

It's mind-blowing, um, many of us are shut down and we want things right away, we want that red pill or whatever blue pill and we want, like, um, you know, but these like instant fixes are not, they don't really work. I mean, they might make you feel better for a day or two, but then, you know, you're back where you started and it sometimes can make it worse, make you feel worse, and healing is not always fun, and you know. You know, but it doesn't have to be serious and it doesn't have to be overwhelming. It can be gentle and it should be gentle, and that's hopefully what I facilitate for others that come to me to have more compassion for themselves and everything they've been through and, to you know, get back on the journey to wholeness and wellness again. And that all boils down to childhood trauma. Um, and, and that's all boils down to childhood trauma. It all boils down to unhealed, untreated, um, childhood trauma and that's passed on to us from generation to generation. And, um, it also has to do with the type of energy that we're exposed to growing up, and that's a whole nother, probably, conversation.

Speaker 2: 39:20

But you're right, we are definitely in survival mode and we're all being re-triggered every time we watch social media, every time, you know, we see like wars and genocides and occupations being played out in front of our eyes, mass killings and murders. How does that make us feel good? It doesn't, but it's a familiar thing that our brain and our nervous system is used to. So it's kind of like wounded adult children tend to replay the drama. They're excited by it. It's a familiar, old sensation. So we feel like we have to keep replaying that old drama and trauma over and over again. But it's the opposite. It's the opposite of what we truly need.

Speaker 2: 40:11

You know, and that's a whole nother conversation, but inner child, you know, we need to learn how to reparent those exiled parts of us, the most vulnerable parts of us, so we could, like you said, we can't heal unless we can feel, yeah, and you know, and we have to stop hurting ourselves just because we were hurt. As they say, hurt people, hurt people. When I heard that, I was like blown away, like oh, yeah, that's true. So it's kind of like a journey. It's a journey of unlearning or kind of redirecting our energy where, you know, we're being shown like a new reality, where we could actually co-create a new reality. Yeah, and we all have that ability, yeah.

Speaker 1: 41:02

We do, we all, and that's where the empowerment is. A lot of people think it's outside of them and they go seeking for that co-regulation of regulating and feeling safety and feeling peace. And it's to recognize that you are doing the activation of that. Somebody is just holding the space so that you can remember what's inside you. Yet when they remove from your space, you're not recognizing the power of choice of how do I want to feel, how do I recreate safety and recognize the harm that you're doing towards yourself. You know I leave people with remember to be kind to yourself.

Speaker 1: 41:41

When a nervous system is activated in fight or flight, we think harshness is going to get us out of the issue, the situation, and it's like no, it's reprogramming that there's safety and there's kindness and asking why are you activated? Why are you in fear? What are you in fear? What are you feeling? Where most of us don't even know how to hold the space to be honest about what we're feeling with fear and afraid, or the embarrassment, or the abandonment, all these different wounds. We don't know how to give it verbiage because we've been told to be something other than these feelings and sensations. So it's, you know, reconnect with those parts that, oh, you mean, we could come into the light of your awareness and you're not gonna, you know, spin out in spirals and everything else and we can process and we can integrate and it's like, yeah, and that is a choice that you have to make.

Speaker 1: 42:34

You know, like you said, sometimes people will get a clarity and an opening, and then what? It lasts for a couple of days and then everything downloads again and they don't realize. Well, you have to do the work to create this safety in your body and it can do a lot of damage because the overwhelm of everything coming back in with a dysregulated nervous system. That's where suicidal ideation comes in, that's where depression comes in, because it's too overwhelming in a density that I don't know that I'm not. This, these thoughts, I don't know that I'm not, these emotions or these experiences, or the identity that you have created inside you with the belief systems, identity that you have created inside you with the belief systems.

Speaker 1: 43:19

And to you know, go through that and create that process. Sometimes it's accelerated for some, sometimes it's a long journey. Everybody has a different path to this connecting into self. Yet that gentleness, that kindness, that's where we come to learn the change and come to learn about our nervous system and the familiar things that it wants to be fed. That it's like no, we don't need that any longer. We can surrender into something that's more and that has more depth. Yet it's easier said than done Like this is why I call it warrior work To be gentle. Your're nervous, it's bucking. It's like nothing good will come from that. Yet until you do it, you don't realize what the value is and the lived experience of it.

Speaker 2: 44:09

Yeah, and it's kind of like taking charge of not taking charge so much. But you know, telling those inner voices that are screaming at us and criticizing us, like the inner critic and a judge that you you know, just to tell them, like, give me, like you need a break, go into this waiting room and let me work on myself, like, just, I'm going to be okay, I'm okay, I'm an adult now, I'm not a child. You have to actually talk to these parts of you that are they're actually just trying to help you, they're actually just trying to protect you, because they still think that you're a five-year-old child. You have to talk to them and have these two-way conversations. Even though it sounds a little crazy crazy, it's actually not, because these are all of the voices, the repressed voices and the. These are like, uh, these are copies of the voices that we heard being told to us when we were scolded, when we were silenced and all of these things. They're not actually real parts of us. They're just reverberations of the past that are living within us and in our brains and our in ourselves and our organs and our muscle memory.

Speaker 2: 45:31

And so, yeah, it's, anybody can give themselves Reiki. It's the most natural thing to do is just putting your hands over your heart and over your you know, your solar plexus, your abdomen, your power center, and just breathing. And also, you know, I always like activate my healing hand. So I rub them together so it feels nice and toasty and warm, you know, like a heating pad warm, you know, like a heating pad. And then I just go through all of my chakras like morning and night, to clear myself, especially in the evening, of everything that I've absorbed, being an energy sensitive empath. So I want to smudge myself, I want to clear myself of all that. But I also want to give myself that healing, therapeutic touch that many of us, unfortunately, are not really receiving as much as we need that.

Speaker 2: 46:21

So, whether it's booking a massage, a Reiki session, any kind of hands-on body work, is perfect. But if you can't do that or if you don't have the funds to do that, you have your own hands. So you can practice these self-care exercises every morning and every night to start your day and just to get back into your body, just to embody your body, right, because a lot of us are way outside of our bodies. Yeah, we're a winner. Yeah, exactly Right, there's a disconnect. Yeah, exactly Right, had to shut them down. We have to freeze them and numb them. That's why I have these emotion wheels. That is really, really cool and I've used it myself. I don't know if you know about the emotions wheels, but they're so complex and nuanced, right that it's not like happy, sad, angry. I mean, it's so much deeper than that.

Speaker 1: 47:38

And then what we can, yeah, and the multitude of emotions that you may be feeling all at once.

Speaker 2: 47:45

Underneath that and underneath that and it's like, oh yeah, when you actually take that emotions wheel and I believe it's available anywhere, like on Amazon you know and then feel it where you're feeling that in these different body parts, like where do you feel sick to your stomach? Oh, in your stomach, that makes sense, right. Or where do you feel like achy or sore? Oh, in your heart, you know. And then you just like tap into that, breathe into that feeling until you could release it and honor it, you know, and embrace it and hug it, like Thich Nhat Hanh always says, like just to like really sit with your feelings and not run away, not fight them, not run from them or away from them, but just sit with them until they pass. Yeah, and that's something we're not taught growing up, so we have to become our own loving parent.

Speaker 1: 48:38

Yeah, and go to places that will help us learn to do it, like my event is called. My event is called Give Yourself Space. So I hold the space so that you feel the permission to give yourself space to feel these intimate parts and that you don't feel alone in doing that, because a lot of us we didn't get the right parenting to hold space for these big emotions. So when we can do this in community and other people can witness and they're not disconnecting from us, that allows us to connect even more deeply within ourselves that oh, somebody else isn't going to reject me because of this.

Speaker 2: 49:13

It's not just me, that it's not me that I'm like broken or defective or something wrong with me. And that's why any kind of support group like what you're doing, what I'm doing, any kind of community, is so important, especially to try not to isolate, cause that, just you know, that's when we really beat ourselves up and punish ourselves with our own dissonant thoughts. You know that are, you know, black and white thinking. They're like they punish us, you know, because they're false, they're, they're programs and they're false beliefs and a lot of them are just bold stories that were never healed. So, yeah, to come together in community, any, any kind of community, so that you're heard and seen and and not just you nothing wrong with you and it didn't start with you yeah, yeah, well, I know the listeners are like okay, nat, nat, you've been talking a lot, yet where can I find vandana?

Speaker 1: 50:10

did I say it right?

Speaker 2: 50:11

yeah, congratulations. Well, you can find me on my website and also on Facebook and on YouTube, but they're all Vandana Light Healing. So Vandana V-A-N-D-A-N-A light, like the light healingcom, and I have a YouTube channel. I have a podcast. The podcast is called Adult Child, the Adult Child in Recovery, the Adult Child podcast. So, yeah, I would love for you to subscribe to my channel, like it, share it, because this work is so important and it's not just for me or you, but we're in this together, so it's really important to kind of uplift, like the name of your podcast, all of humanity right, and so nobody should be left behind.

Speaker 2: 51:06

And so, yeah, vons and Alive, healingcom is my website. You could find all my classes, my offerings, my sessions, what's coming up. Actually, this Saturday I have a workshop called Sending Lost Souls to the Light, because I'm also a medium and so it's been like such a powerful program, and all of my classes are available on the replay as well. So, even if people can't make live broadcasts, they can always just receive the entire two hour replay and just a lot of people do that and it helps them to sleep better and to you know, they just like to take things slow at their own time and so yeah, so that's what I'm doing and I will continue to do as long as possible will continue to do as long as possible.

Speaker 1: 52:01

So I want to thank you for giving the most valuable gift you could give in your life, which is your time, and I want to thank you for doing the alchemy, taking the impurity in your life and turn it into gold. Yet not just keeping the gold for yourself you're sharing it with others. So I want to thank you for everything that you are creating and the warrior work that you're doing in the world.

Speaker 2: 52:22

Thank you. I really appreciate and acknowledge your gift in the world as well, and thank you for shining your light to so many people who really need a light, a guiding light in the world. So I appreciate you as well, and thank you for having me on your show.

Speaker 1: 52:41

It's been a pleasure. Please remember to be kind to yourself. Hey, you made it all the way here. I appreciate you and your time. If you found value in this conversation, please share it out. If there was somebody that popped into your mind, take action and share it out with them. It possibly may not be them that will benefit. It's that they know somebody that will benefit from listening to this conversation. So please take action and share out the podcast. You can find us on social media on Facebook, instagram and TikTok under Lift One Self, and if you want to inquire about the work that I do and the services that I provide to people, come over on my website, come into a discovery, call liftoneselfcom. Until next time, please remember to be kind and gentle with yourself. You matter.